Computer Business Review

The 5 worst tech jargon terms

by | 19 May 2014

An opportunity to drill down to the most challenging buzzwords in tech.

It's an exciting time to be in the IT sector. The pace of investment in new technologies is growing fast and companies are doing more than simply reaching for the low-hanging fruit.

While we all know that big data is a real game changer, we also know how confusing it can be to talk about it with some 'big data evangelist' or someone. Let's face it, tech has developed its own language, and it's harder to learn than Latin.

But it doesn't need to be. Here's a handy guide to the worst bits of tech jargon, so that next time you hear them, instead of nodding politely along you can react like a human being and scream 'What does that meeeeeeeeean?' while ripping tufts of your own hair out.

You're welcome.

Infobesity

How did this one get invented? 'It's, like, being fat...with information.' It basically means a data glut - too much for one person to digest. Not in a literal way, of course, like you're eating too many newspapers. Typically you'll find it in most press releases about big data.

Happily, the word has led to someone writing a book called The Information Diet, the website for which is adorned with such wonderful supporting quotes as: "I've decided to be much more selective about what information I feed my head."

Productise

Product what? Hey, who said nouns can't be horribly morphed into verbs? This word is a convincing argument against the pretty sensible idea that English is defined through usage.

Depressingly, Oxford Dictionaries actually has this word listed: it means 'to make or develop a service or concept into a product'.

But just think how awful it is. Someone has just taken the word product and added -ise to bring it to life like some evil part-word part-nonsense Frankenstein verb. It reeks of laziness (how hard is it to say 'we're going to turn this into a product'?) but we can imagine it being part of entire conversations consisting of nothing but pronouns, conjunctions and jargon terms between two business people.

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