Revealing losses matching the company’s (shrunken) turnover in Germany, IBM chairman John Akers says he sees real signs of recovery. In his final act as President, George Bush declares trade war on Japan over chip imports, and warns the Japanese to remember Pearl Harbor. IBM is selling mainframes at 37% of list. J A N […]
Revealing losses matching the company’s (shrunken) turnover in Germany, IBM chairman John Akers says he sees real signs of recovery. In his final act as President, George Bush declares trade war on Japan over chip imports, and warns the Japanese to remember Pearl Harbor. IBM is selling mainframes at 37% of list.
J A N U A R Y
French farmers are in revolt over imported British agricultural software. Unisys figures show that the company is starting to grow again. Germany refuses to cut interest rates. The Danish Krone falls out of the Exchange Rate Mechanism. The Nikkei falls below 16,000. Steve Jobs says NeXTStep 486 will ship by the end of the year. IBM is selling mainframes at 33% of list. Acer Group of Taiwan appoints Ken Olsen chief executive. Sun Microsystems turns SunSoft into a holding company with nine subsidiaries.
F E B R U A R Y
Olivetti files bankruptcy papers; Italian government can’t help: it’s bankrupt too. Germany raises interest rates as inflation hits 5%. Al Gore falls asleep as he makes maiden speech as Vice-President; no-one notices – they’re all asleep too. The Irish punt falls out of the Exchange Rate Mechanism. The Nikkei falls to 15,000. Olivetti is rescued by the Vatican and renamed Holivetti. The Pope declines the post of Papa and chief executive. Compaq says Prolinea backlog is two months. IBM is selling mainframes at 29% of list. Bob Djurdjevic bones up on pork belly futures. Intel insists that there are no overheating problems with Pentium, delays ships to May.
M A R C H
The Italian govern ment describes Denmark’s presidency of the European Community as the worst since Britain’s. Germany refuses to cut interest rates. Britain says it remains fully committed to rejoining the Exchange Rate Mechanism when the time is right. Norman Lamont delivers his budget and tells the House he wants to spend more time with his family. The Nikkei falls below 14,000. Losses at Amdahl exacerbate a major cash crisis at Fujitsu, which rushes forward the flotation of ICL. Sun forms SunDries for computer supplies and SunTruss for support. Unisys starts paying dividends again. IBM is selling mainframes at 23% of list. Nazi thugs burn down Sony’s Berlin premises: Chancellor Kohl wins big cheers when he says the perpetrators are just high-spirited hooligans, reminds listeners that German-Japanese friendship goes back more than 50 years.
A P R I L
French farmers are revolting again. Norman Lamont’s family says it doesn’t want to spend more time with him. Germany refuses to cut interest rates. The French franc falls out of the Exchange Rate Mechanism. The Nikkei dips to 13,000. Fujitsu floats 25% of ICL at 225 pence a share. ICL shares soar to 465 pence in first week of trading. The factory testing Intel’s Pentium burns down. Intel delays ships until October. The German government persuades Siemens to take over IBM Deutschland after it reports losses that exceed turnover. IBM is selling mainframes at 17% of list.
M A Y
IBM System User relaunches as Microsoft User. Italian government falls as it is revealed that Vatican money to rescue Olivetti came from the Mafia; Cosa Nostra says we were just doing Our Thing. John Major, unable to find anyone willing to succeed Lamont, reminds the House that he is First Lord of the Treasury and takes the job himself. Germany raises interest rates as inflation reaches 7%. The Nikkei falls below 12,000. Apple merges with Motorola, buys all rights to the PowerPC from IBM. Norman Lamont joins IBM as chief financial officer, says he sees glimmers of green among the brown shoots of economic winter. IBM is selling mainframes at 13% of list. Advanced Micro Devices starts shipping Am586 in 100MHz, 150MHz and 200MHz versions.
J U N E
The German budget deficit soars as Chancellor Kohl bribes Hitachi and Toshiba to close their German operations and transfer them to Northern Ireland; a relieved Toshiba says IRA terrorists are rank amateurs compared with Nazi thugs. French farmers are still revolting. The Nikkei rises to 12,000. Full year losses are bigger at DEC as Alpha gets of
f to slow start. First half losses at Groupe Bull cause the company to plead with the French government to take it over. Government points out that it already owns it.
J U L Y
Francis Lorentz makes Paris Metro pay by replacing all personnel with computers. ICL shares soar to 720 pence. French farmers are on vacation. The Dutch guilder falls out of the Exchange Rate Mechanism. IBM is selling mainframes at 7% of list. The Nikkei dips below 12,000. Cash crisis deepens at Fujitsu: it tries and fails to sell Amdahl to Electronic Data Systems. General Motors tries and succeeds in selling Electronic Data Systems to AT&T. After disappointing year-end figures, Sun consolidates all subsidiaries back into parent, renamed SunSet. NeXTstep 486 is renamed NeXT step Pentium. Intel promises Pentium by year-end.
A U G U S T
Acer under Olsen buys DEC. IBM mainframes go for 3% of list. The French government engineers a merger between Bull and the Paris Metro, where Francis Lorentz is in charge. French farmers drive cattle through the tunnels of the high-speed RER in protest. Germany refuses to cut interest rates. The Belgian franc is forced out of the Exchange Rate Mechanism. The Nikkei plunges below 11,000. ICL shares hit UKP10. Fujitsu sells another 30% to ease its cash crisis. Compaq says Prolinea backlog is six months. IBM bundles a mainframe with every RS/6000 it sells.
S E P T E M B E R
French farmers are even more revolting. Germany refuses to cut interest rates. The mark stands firm in the Exchange Rate Mechanism. Siemens abandons computers, sells user base to Unisys for $1. The Nikkei dips to 10,000. ICL takes advantage of its highly-rated paper to buy Dell; Michael Dell becomes chief operating officer. Apple-Motorola buys Acer. Sculley fires Olsen, kills Alpha. Britain says it remains fully committed to rejoining the Exchange Rate Mechanism when the time is right.
O C T O B E R
IBM third quarter losses exceed the gross domestic product of California as warehouses fill up with unsold RS/6000s. An emergency board meeting is called for November 28. Intel promises Pentium by mid-1994. The Nikkei hits 9,000. ICL buys Compaq. Prolinea backlog shrinks to one week. IBM’s emergency board meeting ousts the entire management, but Thanksgiving by IBM employees is short-lived as it appoints W Michael Blumenthal to succeed John Akers. The UK government just survives vote of confidence by one vote as opposition leader John Smith votes with Tories saying You got yourselves into this mess, I’m not getting you out of it. N O V E M B E R
Germany cuts interest rates as inflation falls to 11%. The Deutschmark falls out of the Exchange Rate Mechanism. Luxembourg says it remains fully committed to keeping its currency within the ERM. Jacques Delors reminds Luxembourg that it doesn’t have a currency. The Nikkei falls below 7,000. Hailing the historic opportunities for synergy and manufacturing efficiencies, IBM under Blumenthal makes a highly leveraged hostile bid for General Motors with money borrowed from an unidentified Arab country. GM shareholders take the money and run. ICL buys Fujitsu, sells mainframe side on to AT&T’s Electronic Data Systems. Hitachi asks AT&T to take its mainframe business as well. Hewlett-Packard buys the rest of Hi tachi’s computer business.
D E C E M B E R
Intel cancels Pentium, promises Sextium in early 1995. NeXTStep 486 becomes NeXTstep Septium. President Clinton wants to spend more time with Gennifer Flowers. France unilaterally abrogates the Maastricht Treaty when President Mitterrand realises that the Common Defence Policy requires conscription of French farmers. The UK ratifies the Maastricht Treaty. Computergram is summoned to appear before the California Committee on Politically Correct Conduct. The Nikkei hits a new high of 55,500. Happy New Year.